what ails me

Don’t squat with your spurs on.
cowboy logic

I awakened one morning with a pain in my hiney (to be polite) and realized we are in the month of November already. This month is halfway expended, and my discomfort has ceased. So, I can’t blame the calendar change. And, I can state with absolute certainty that I haven’t squatted on my spurs. So, what ailed me?! It was suggested that I’ve had lack of exercise, and my muscles are out of shape. I won’t buy that excuse. It’s so passe. Who needs physical fitness. I have seriously checked off a list of possible causes, some included are: sitting on a quilting pin or maybe a knitting needle or maybe poor posture while riding on the back of the Harley. I found none of these plausible, but all I know is that I must find the source of the pain in my a**. I fear it could return. Upon walking into a room, it dawned on me the source of the trouble… a magenta wall .

Six years ago I began (note: began ) a large painting project in a room with a cathedral ceiling. There is a blue carpet along with gray tiles. I chose a very light gray called Crushed Ice for the big walls. Beforehand, I decided that I needed color in my life and wanted something bright and cheery for an accent wall. At the paint shop, I studied the color chart and found that magenta was the one. Little did I remember that I once had a magenta sweater that drove me crazy, kept me on edge all the time. It’s not my color I tell you. But, the color chart showed that’s what I had to use. I think I was in a bit of a confused state while purchasing the paint. The accent wall was the first stage completed, but as I continued on with the Crushed Ice, something was nagging me. Little did I realize it was the magenta already in place. In fact, I believe it caused me to climb to the very top of the ladder, past the point of stability. A ringing phone startled me, and I nearly toppled off the ladder with paint can and brush in tow. The painting project remains unfinished to this day. I have determined the magenta wall to be the source of the pain in my derriere. That’s my story, and I’m sticking to it.